Backbone Power the Science of Saying No
Respected psychotherapist tackles the modern epidemic of people-pleasing head-on with her insightful self-help book, offering transformational advice designed to empower and educate readers on how to say no with gusto.
We have all felt the sinking feeling that comes from accepting other peoples' wishes above our own. Whether we have reluctantly complied with the decisions of a boss, a parent or a friend, our actions are usually fueled by our desperate need to please. If we find ourselves, constantly giving way to others we may also be incapable of saying no to additional external forces, such as food, alcohol, drugs or sex. Saying no has been stigmatized; an assured rejection often being presented as a selfish act of defiance. Afraid to state our needs publicly, many of us have allowed our pattern of pleasing to become an obsession. So what is this need to please and what is the science behind this need to please? And how can we learn to say "yes" to saying no?
Dr. Brown demonstrates how she has taught her clients to speak powerfully and with intention using "speech acts"; to speak with a commitment to their truth; and to welcome having their blindness's revealed. By adopting Dr. Brown's simple "backbone tools" these individuals learned to be honest with themselves for the first time and began to suffer less, increasing their competence in the world, conducting their lives with "the dignity of a warrior" and greater authenticity.